Life – Hey (Oscar winner!) Sandra Bullock, fancy a stepmom swap?

The perfect Stepmom!

Re-posted from Feb 1 2010, if only because I’m so delighted she won!

More step-mum nonsense to deal with this week. Bloody annoying. I’ve organised for the boys to watch Question of Sport being filmed in Manchester this week and am really hoping that isn’t ruined!

I’ve (willingly and happily) cared for Mr Moregeous’s 11yr Steppy 1 on a weekly basis for nearly 7  years, however his BM loathes me. I mean REALLY loathes me, with a uncontrollable and insane passion which hasn’t lessened in the slightest with the passage of time. As many do, we plan childcare and dates around shifts & work, and also Mr M’s 17yr old Steppy 2 also comes to stay, so he and his BM need dates in advance too; having fought through the courts to get access to Steppy 1, the dates have always had to be agreed six months in advance, by letter or now email. With, of course, the usual obstacles thrown in. But suddenly this Christmas, no agreement, no confirmations. Radio silence. So what does he do – still turn up on the dates he’s mailed? BM has randomly called the police in the past if she disputes dates, gone mental, shouting and swearing at school, throwing abuse etc. I remember one time she got the dates wrong and I actually got the finger for daring to look her way in the playground, in front of staff and children!

So finally we asked Steppy 1 to ask BM to confirm the dates and she promised to do so. Then didn’t. Asked again, more promises, no confirmation. So then Mr M emailed, saying we need the dates, can’t get Steppy 2 sorted without them, so the boys miss out on seeing each other ( they get on GREAT, much love there). Given that Steppy 1’s BM, when married to Mr M, looked after Steppy 2 for over 8 years, you’d think there’d be some compassion for that, huh? Oooooh noooooo, this was the mail returned:

I am agreeable to the dates provided.  Please note they could be subject to change with plenty of notice but I wont of course impinge on the dates you have booked to take (Steppy 1) away.  You will understand that its impossible for the dates to be set in stone.

Maybe now you and Sian could stop pestering (Steppy 1) about something which is out of his control.  What business it is of Sian’s in any event I fail to grasp.  Its rather like Des telling me to obtain the dates off you.  That’s something that just wouldn’t happen.  To tell (Steppy 1) that unless I confirm the dates he is unable to see (Steppy 2) is a tad strong.  Its not his fault you have to juggle your children around.


So now:

  • we still can’t really rely on any of the dates,
  • we’ve been reminded of whose ‘control’ it’s in,
  • I’m reminded it’s none of my business even though I’ve been an integral part of Steppy 1’s life for 7 years, I love him and he loves me,
  • Des (BM’s new partner and father of her baby) is relegated to being a piece of doggy doo on BM’s shoe, quite apart from the fact that  there is no comparison between what he and I have to organise,
  • Steppy 2 is dismissed out of hand and compared to a sponge ball

I demand to know how the fabuolous Sandra Bullock’s bloke’s ex is a loony drug taking porn star with a prison record, yet they’ve all managed to get over it, sort their sh*t out and get on with their lives?!  Whilst I get a loony legal executive with control issues who refuses point blank to get over an irrational and deep seated hatred of anyone who doesn’t do things her way!

Oh Sandra, fancy a swap?

Addendum: Sandra, now you’ve done the deed and won both a Razzle AND an Oscar, I’m sure you want a bit of a break to your life, so I’ll expect your e-mail sometime today…..

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